Fulfill My Dharma
A poem about the feelings of stress that come with parenting and the desire for an escape.
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Pandemic Practice
Who has less time since the schools have been closed? I know I certainly do. It’s funny to see single people’s posts on social media versus people who have children’s posts. During this time I have to admit I’ve fantasized about what this experience might be like if I didn’t have my 7 year old
Losing My Identity
To die to self means to let the fear of death go knowing that we are part of the energy that manifests into everything and everyone we see. To die to self means to accept change and transformation knowing that the physical form is temporary, but I am eternal.
Accept Change, Accept Peace – Fearing Change is Acting in Vain
I keep refocusing my unruly mind back to the fact that change is. Change is. Change is. Looking at the design of this world, we encounter change every day, though most of it doesn’t feel as though it directly affects us in a major way. Animals die, leaves die, plants die, cells die, people die, and at the same time births continue. Nature is cyclical and balanced.
In Times of Uncertainty… Buy More? (Covid-19 Thoughts)
The thing that I am not laughing at and actually feel really saddened and quite frankly sickened by is the lack of consideration for our fellow humans which is on full display right now. Self-preservation seems to be running at an all time high as evidenced by the insane buying behavior. There is a demon of “me” “me” “me” running through society.
Bringing Sexy Back
I don’t know when it changed, but today as I was putting my clean bras away and attempting to declutter and clear away the excess ones that I don’t wear while attempting to minimalize, it hit me. All the bras I no longer wear are the cute, lacy, sexy ones. I have stopped making the effort to feel sexy and be sexy.
Ego at Work
As I engage in self-study, I see when my ego is about to roar and am better able to take a pause before I say or do something that won’t lead to the highest good… mine or anybody else’s. Today, while on a conference call, I felt my annoyance growing with a colleague of mine
Year of Yes Reflection
Why do we complain incessantly about the same things rather than take the initiative to fix them? I just finished reading “Year of Yes” by Shonda Rhimes, so it may be why my partner’s complaints about the same old things are really grating on my nerves. I’m trying to start living my own life in
New Definition of Passion
I woke up this morning thinking about commitment, self-discipline, and the definition of passion. I recently read a book called, “Everything that Remains,” by Joshua Fields Milburn and Ryan Nicodemus and it inspired me in a very real way. I felt as though it was divinely put on my path at this point in my
Choose Your Tenants Wisely
Perfectionism, the beast that refuses to die within me. It’s the sneaky one who takes me out when I least expect it and hits me with the sucker punch more often than I’d like to admit. It’s the demon that I can never seem to spot right away. Most times it’s dragging me into its
Yoga is not a Workout!
Truth… Satya, as it is called in the Yamas. Today’s reading during the close of yoga practice really hit home for me. The reading described how not living in our truth saps the life out of us. It’s as though God says, “Well, since you aren’t doing what I created you to do… I guess
Play
Play… that’s the word that came to mind the other day during my yoga asana practice. In the midst of savasana, my wandering mind suddenly started pondering how yoga invites us to play with contraction and extension, tension and relaxation, strength and flexibility, comfort and discomfort. Life also is constantly knocking at our door asking
Addicted to my Phone?
Addiction is insidious. It creeps in without being seen and takes hold of one’s mind under the guise of normalcy. It pretends that it belongs there because, “other people do it,” “it’s no big deal”, “it isn’t really affecting my life.” Yet, when we attempt to stop, we realize how big of a hold it
Road Rage
We are very interesting creatures. As I grow in my spirituality and more deeply into myself I’m coming to understand this journey more each day. Yesterday, I stumbled. I acted reactively when confronted with a frustrating situation. Traffic was at a standstill on the highway I was attempting to merge onto and this man a
New Friends, Prayers Answered
Tonight, I went to a birthday party for a girl at my daughter’s school. I have to admit I was feeling a little stressed out with the thought of going. I’d ordered her gift on Amazon and it didn’t come in on time. Delivery stated that it would be in at any point through 9pm
Follow Through
It’s frustrating when someone says they will do something and then they don’t. This one thing cuts through me like a knife. If you want to irritate me, tell me you are going to do something and then fail to do it. I think I’m a pretty easy person to live with. I don’t ask
Resentment and Relationships
The end of a 30 year marriage doesn’t just happen in a split second. It happens slowly day by day and year by year due to lack of compassion, understanding, and love. For example, when one partner chooses to work weekends while the other partner craves quality time and prioritizes family above all else it
From Ego to Love
It’s interesting how judgment can lead to such insidious behavior in people. Recently, I’d had an experience where I was severely misjudged. An extremely off base attack was made on my parenting, which could have resulted in a violent situation if I were a different person than I am today. I am so grateful for
Religion: Pathway to Hell or Gateway to Heaven?
Religion… the gateway to hell or a pathway to something deeper and more profound? I was just listening to Lauren Daigle’s song “Losing my Religion” which prompted me to ponder this point. Religion has brought about a lot of ugliness and division in this world, yet I feel religion is trying to point us in
What Does it Mean to Practice Yoga?
“Practice” is what we call our inner work and the movement through the asanas when on the mat. Has anyone ever questioned what we are practicing for or what practice actually means? Many that show up for yoga practice often don’t realize that not only are they practicing in the verb tense, but that they
Social Anxiety… Get Away From Me
I’ve just completed my first weekend of the long anticipated 200 hour yoga teacher training and it was full of emotions. As someone who is very self-aware, I realized several things over the course of this weekend. I noticed how expectation of my own performance and capability consistently has a negative impact within my life.
Spiritual Reckoning
I’ve just started my yoga teacher training as another means to teach what it means to be heart centered and live from the inside out. My passion is God and this passion leads me to seek ways to help others realize who they are so that they can bring everything that they have to offer
Many Faces
It’s easy to stay peaceful and calm when life is going smoothly, but the challenge is to maintain positivity when life starts to pick up the pace. When we have multiple things screaming for our attention and we start getting pulled in all directions is when we need to remember that we have trained for
All Fun and Games…. or Is It?
Today I took part in an interesting conversation and I’m sure it’s one that many have been having in these times. I listened to 2 of my colleagues discuss video games like diner dash, candy crush, Farmville, paint by number, etc. I listen to them speak of the anxiety that these games caused them and
Show Up for Yoga, Show Up for Life
Today, my yoga instructor called my attention to the fact that when we practice yoga, we practice many of the same asanas (poses) repeatedly. I don’t know why this never really struck me before given that the definition of practice includes the words “repeatedly” and “habitually.” Just like yoga, life is often about the repetition
Earth, the Classroom for Unlearning
What if we’re “Satan”? Satan is cunning, selfish and always out for his own best interest. He constantly lies and persuades humanity to make destructive choices. In the Bible, he was cast down by God for selfishness and attempting to usurp God (Isaiah 14:12-15). After reading the Bible, I believe our ego is Satan. It’s
Emptiness
Emptiness. So often when many of us think of emptiness, it brings up feelings of despair, sadness, boredom, and frustration. I’ve been this way for a long time, frustrated by the idea of not knowing what I was meant to do with my life. I often felt as though there was something that I was
Wedding Wonders
Last night, while my mother took our daughter overnight, my fiancé of over 5 years and I went to have dinner at the first spot I’ve seriously considered as a wedding venue. I’m sharing this because it’s been a long time coming and I feel God has been working with me and leading me to
Be a Home
“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.” – Albert Einstein I wrote a piece awhile back called “Trees Teach.” As I was laying in bed this morning, listening to the birds chirping outside and the sound of the breeze blowing through the leaves, the large tree outside of my window spoke
Selfish Mom
I’ve been noticing societal programming that basically says, “It’s selfish for you to do anything without your family if you have a family.” It’s as though when you have children, many people expect that you bring them on every vacation. If you are doing something fun for yourself that could potentially be fun for your