Is the Self Help Industry Helping Anyone?

Is the self-help industry really helping anyone? I finally wake up and ask myself. It’s an industry fueled by the perceived void that exists within humanity as a whole. Those of us who have taken an interest in becoming the best possible versions of ourselves are well versed with many of the materials and groups out there. As I paused to question my intentions for this project, I realized I didn’t want to become someone who capitalizes off people’s perceived lack when my goal is to help them realize that there is nothing lacking. The whole world operates this way (I help you for money because I don’t “give my time away”), but Jesus states,

“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and be enslaved to money.”
– Matthew 6:24 NLT

Capitalism is built off need (aka desire). I make you believe that you need to be “more something” and convince you that you need my product or service in order to remedy that desire. So often we want to be healthier, happier, smarter, well-liked, successful, more acceptable, more beautiful, etc. That’s how this whole thing works in a nutshell. Sometimes I question whether there are many businesses left that truly operate out of the genuine desire to help people. Although I do think many start out with good intentions, I also think the general human traits of desire and greed often take over and money unfortunately ends up taking precedence over serving from a genuine good heart. The responsibility therefore lies with you, the consumer. To ensure you are not being taken advantage of, you need to ask yourself, “When is it enough? When are you enough? When do you have enough? What is enough?”

I understand that many who charge substantial amounts reinvest in the community or in charity, but I wonder if it’s very much at all or if that is the excuse they use for making themselves feel better about not doing more to help others rise up. “To whom much is given, much is expected.” There are so many living well above their means while others go without for lack of opportunity or ability due to the environment they were born into. Many have not seen another way of life, or state of mind than what they’ve grown accustomed to as normalcy. I’m not talking about people who have a rough start in the U.S. because we all have heard the success stories of “project” to “professional” as a result of the ability we have to access educational resources, learn, and seize opportunities that present themselves in this country. I’m talking about children who are born in impoverished places who don’t really stand a chance because all that they will ever know is poverty passed down from one generation to the next… from mindsets, to daily living, from birth until death. It is harder to rise when you are surrounded by people who have always been poor, whether that be in Spirit or monetary wealth. To grow we need exposure to “the light”… the light of a different way of being that brings more joy, more resources, and more love.

Does anyone really need excessive amounts of clothing, jewelry, furniture, homes with square footage over 400x the size of the ground they take up while standing? Again, what is enough? Does anyone ever even ask this question for themselves? When will you have enough to be happy? When will you be enough to be happy? When will you have “grown” enough personally or professionally to be happy? We’re all on this journey through life for an undetermined period of time and somewhere along the line we’ve developed this idea that we must have, do, or become more to make it all worthwhile.

What if none of it is true? What if you already are enough because you exist? What if the whole point is just to fully take in the experience of being alive, which can only be done when contrast exists? What if the point isn’t to give anything to life, but to solely be exceedingly grateful for the gift of life that’s been given to us and to enjoy each moment of it? What if the point is only to be happy, joyful, experience, and learn more about who we are in relation to it all?

When I think about what it means for me to serve God, I’m starting to realize that it is more about being. It’s about being exactly who I was created to be, being thankful for it, and loving it. It’s about embracing all of God’s other creations, being thankful for them, and loving them because their existence allows me to experience who I am. Without space and form, nothing separate from me could exist and I would not know who “I” was, which brings me to the idea of “ubuntu” a term that I believe I first learned of in a book by Mark Nepo.

Wikipedia excerpt:
According to Michael Onyebuchi Eze, the core of ubuntu can best be summarized as follows:

“A person is a person through other people’ strikes an affirmation of one’s humanity through recognition of an ‘other’ in his or her uniqueness and difference. It is a demand for a creative intersubjective formation in which the ‘other’ becomes a mirror (but only a mirror) for my subjectivity. This idealism suggests to us that humanity is not embedded in my person solely as an individual; my humanity is co-substantively bestowed upon the other and me. Humanity is a quality we owe to each other. We create each other and need to sustain this otherness creation. And if we belong to each other, we participate in our creations: we are because you are, and since you are, definitely I am. The ‘I am’ is not a rigid subject, but a dynamic self-constitution dependent on this otherness creation of relation and distance.”

What if our only purpose is to live in awe of all of the miraculous phenomenon’s that we are surrounded by daily but have stopped noticing? What if it is solely about discovery, joy, and acceptance and love for all that is? If that is the case, this whole world is “sinning” a.k.a. missing the mark with regard to what we are “supposed to be” doing here? Imagine the dismay of the creator sitting back and watching this hot mess of a society like, “I gave you a gift to enjoy and here you are stressing, worrying, and fearing what was meant to be enjoyed. Some of you even feel like you have to give me back what I have freely given you as though you believe you have to pay off a debt for this gift of life I’ve given you. Your only job was to receive. That is it… just receive life and experience and love.”

“Therefore I say unto you, Be not anxious for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; nor yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more than the food, and the body than the raiment? ²⁶ Behold the birds of the heaven, that they sow not, neither do they reap, nor gather into barns; and your heavenly Father feedeth them. Are not ye of much more value than they? ²⁷ And which of you by being anxious can add one cubit unto ^[a]the measure of his life? ²⁸ And why are ye anxious concerning raiment? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow; they toil not, neither do they spin: ²⁹ yet I say unto you, that even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ³⁰ But if God doth so clothe the grass of the field, which to-day is, and to-morrow is cast into the oven, shall he not much more clothe you, O ye of little faith? ³¹ Be not therefore anxious, saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? ³² For after all these things do the Gentiles seek; for your heavenly Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things. ³³ But seek ye first his kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. ³⁴ Be not therefore anxious for the morrow: for the morrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”

– Matthew 6:25-34

“There“ is no greater than your “here”, for when your “there” becomes “here” you will wish you were someplace else.”-
– Jacqueline Collet

Happiness is found in the “now” and when happiness is yours, there is nowhere else you’d rather be. You can relax in peace, receiving all that has always been yours to claim. It is here that you can appreciate the various forms and situations that arise within your consciousness knowing that even the seemingly “bad” experiences are a gift because they provide the necessary contrast for you to experience joy and peace. They even make life fairly exciting and interesting… allowing us both challenge and victory. It is the rough sea that make us appreciate the calm one all the more. It’s easier to see when you have a moment of peace and clarity such as the one that I am in at the moment. It’s as though the calmness of the mind allows it to open up and remember such things.

I’ve signed up for weekends at retreats. I’ve read a multitude of books of a spiritual and growth nature. I’ve “invested in myself.” Yet, I still stand by my old statement of, “Nobody can “fix” me.” Nobody can “fix” you either because YOU AREN’T BROKEN. The world is broken, but you are not. You just may be falling victim to the world’s sick methods of making you believe that you are not enough, which often leads toward self-hatred and self-destruction of one kind or another. That is the area that we sometimes need help from others, resources, and healing to recover from. We need help to remember after buying into the lies that the world has been feeding us for far too long. That is ultimately why we read the books, why we buy the seminars, why we take the classes, and why we sometimes drive ourselves crazy trying to have more, be more, and do more.

I pray that my work speaks truth, love, light, and healing to your heart. I pray that you wake up to see that you are and have always been whole… remember. I pray that your heart and mind be overcome with truth so that you can deflect the lies as they come. I pray that you develop the skills necessary to protect your innocent soul. We live in a beautiful world full of sickness. It is my goal to play a part in healing some of it by wielding words like a weapon against the bitter lies that attempt to deprive you of your joy. I pray that you “overcome the world” as Jesus spoke,

“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.”

– John 16:33

Sidenotes/Afterthoughts: I chose the forget-me-not photo as the image for this post because these truths are so important that you should “forget-it-not.”
YOU ARE NOT BROKEN!
YOU DO NOT NEED ANYTHING MORE TO BE COMPLETE!
YOU SIMPLY HAVE TO VOMIT UP THE GARBAGE THE WORLD HAS BEEN FEEDING YOU…
Let me help you purge…

OK, that created a gross mental image. But seriously, let me help you find what’s true! (there that’s better)