Today was a trying day of home schooling due to a professional development day at my daughter’s school. Though I was so over it earlier, I’ve managed to put myself back into a space of love, hope, compassion, and gratitude this evening. Sometimes, or rather always, it’s the simple things in life that bring happiness. After I finished working, I was roped into playing Barbie dolls for a bit against my wishes, though oddly enough playing dolls on the floor always seems to make me smile even though it’s the last thing I want to do on most days. When I get down to her level and allow myself to simply play I recognize the ease of being a child and am brought back to my childhood where I spent endless hours entertaining myself as an only child playing with my own Barbie dolls. It’s as though the child I was is playing with the child I have. It’s fun to see her in a different light… to hear the roles she has the dolls play and the laughter that comes out of her when I say something random. She thinks I’m the funniest human on the planet, though I’m not really a comedian and tend to be more on the contemplative and serious side.
It’s strange that as we grow up we lose touch with the simplicity of play. The idea of pretending and role playing seems so much less entertaining as an adult. I watch my child play with other children after school and am sometimes in awe of the joy that a rocking playground car brings when they all pile into it and imagine they are on some magical trip. They mirror shows like “The Magic School Bus” and they are off on their own adventure. The imagination of a child is a beautiful thing. As we grow older, our imagination stops being fun and starts being utilized to imagine doomsday scenarios. What if we lose our jobs and can’t pay our bills? What if our child gets into trouble when they go out with their friends? What if we never fulfill our dreams? What if that slight pain we felt in our side earlier turns out to be cancer?
It somehow becomes practice to train our imagination back into the childlike state of innocence and beauty. It becomes effort to utilize our imagination in the way it was intended… to bring joy, fun, and ease into our lives. Jesus taught that to enter the “kingdom of heaven” one must become childlike,
“When Jesus saw what was happening, he was angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children. 15 I tell you the truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never enter it.” 16 Then he took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them.”
– Mark 10:14-16 NLT
When one uses their imagination as a child uses theirs, the world becomes a place of wonder, mystery, excitement, and joy. We can sit in awe of the rain that nourishes the plants and wonder how we manage to kill our single house plant from overwatering or not enough water and yet there is so much life that is sustained properly by nature itself. We can stare at the ocean and imagine the world that lies beneath it… so much of it unknown and unseen to us. We can listen to the birds sing and imagine them speaking to one another or singing us a love song as we awake in the morning. Everything becomes a sacred moment where we can’t help but be moved by the world around us. In moments where we can truly feel everything and see everything as the mystery and the miracle that it is, we are catching a glimpse of “Heaven on Earth…” the “Kingdom of God.”
I find as I get older, I long to see more and more of this world. I find myself soaking in documentaries that show the many beautiful places I may never get to experience in person… the brilliant creatures that share this place with me… the adventures that I may never get to take. I travel vicariously with those that I see on the television and am blessed by the ability to see so much of the world, if only through the screen, in my lifetime. It’s something our ancestors didn’t have the privilege of. While it would be nice to take my own expedition someday and explore much more of the world than what I have to date, I find peace in the shows, books, and photographs that others have shared in the act of kindness and love.
I find that life is about constantly returning to center over and over again. It’s a love affair where we depart and distance from our higher self again and again only to come back with a deeper appreciation for life itself each time and fall deeper and deeper into the unconditional love that surrounds us. For instance, as I mentioned in the beginning of this writing… earlier today, I was off-center. I was struggling to complete work assignments, prep for conference calls, lead conference calls, serve as a teacher, chef, workout coach (gym assignment that my daughter likes me to participate in with her), and parent. My anxiety was high and the stress of trying to do everything was getting to me. When we have too much on our plate and don’t adjust our expectations, it’s easy to become overwhelmed and devolve into a state of fear and panic. This state is where we often lash out at our kids and find ourselves bitching and moaning about everything in life rather than living in the state of bliss and gratitude I’d previously mentioned.
When the work day was over, I chose to watch “Expedition Happiness” on Netflix, which lifted my spirits and it was pizza for dinner. I know, not the healthiest, but sometimes simplicity and ease is what is required to bring us back into alignment. I snuggled onto the couch with a fuzzy blanket, made myself a cup of healthy hot cocoa (made with raw cacao and almond milk), and snuggled with my family. My daughter played on her pad most of the time, but at the end of the film, she even complimented my movie choice. I needed a little “vacation” from the stresses of the day this evening and this film was exactly what the doctor ordered. Maybe someday, I’ll have the privilege of taking you with me as I travel and explore some of the beauty in this world, but until then I’ll remain grateful for the many beautiful things I do have… family, sustenance, comfort, privilege, health, imagination, access to knowledge, senses to experience this life, and so much love in this tiny space I call home.