I hope you understand by this point that the goal of yoga is freedom and so the yamas that I am writing about at this time are intended to break one free of anything that may burden the individual or restrain them from reaching the highest version of themselves. The spiritual path isn’t really about acquiring anything, but more about veering away from and cutting out anything that blocks the beauty that is innately within you. Aparigrahā speaks to non-possessiveness. It basically asks that we abstain from greed and hoarding. This piggy-backs off of asteya (non-stealing). The premise is that when we hoard for ourselves, we take what could be utilized to provide for others (see my recent reflections on this here). This observance requires that we renounce possession of all, but necessary items. Of course, it doesn’t go into detail on what is “necessary.” That is for the individual to discern.
A few years back I listened to the audio-book “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up: The Japanese Art of Decluttering and Organizing,” by Marie Kondo. This book goes deep into why this observance is important. The more you own, the more you feel responsible for. It takes energy to store, clean, and care for whatever you possess. When we let go of that which we don’t really need, more energy is reserved for what is most important to us. As I previously mentioned, yoga helps us to learn how to master our energy/power so that we have all facets of our being moving in the same direction rather than battling each other. When we learn to flow with the energy that lives within us (walk with God), we are at our best. Therefore, it makes sense that we would want to avoid wasting energy on what holds little value in our lives so that we can utilize the energy on what is most meaningful.
Patanjali even warns about accepting gifts from others. He recognized that our acceptance of gifts causes us to lose our neutrality. Our subconscious automatically believes that it has to reciprocate and makes one more likely to say “yes” to things they don’t want or give what they don’t genuinely want to give. In other words, it clouds our judgement and decision making ability. Car dealerships are not simply being “nice” when they offer you coffee, water, cookies, etc. They know about the need to reciprocate that lies within the recesses of the human psyche and are setting the deck in their favor by offering you something of low value as a “gift” so that you more likely feel “bad” about saying no to their sales pitch. It’s psychology used in a self-serving way, not kindness. When you don’t take anything, you are free to say “no” without guilt. There is no part within you that feels that you “owe them something” because of the generosity that they’d shown you previously.
There is a reason why government officials are not supposed to accept gifts and this is it. When you are in a position that requires you to serve all with neutrality, it is imperative that one avoid partiality. Gifts have the tendency to make one lean toward the gift giver, similar to how plants have a tendency to lean toward the light. The child within us says, “Ooooh I like that, give me more” and strips the wise adult self from exercising sound judgment. Kids are very trusting and generally like anyone who shows them a little kindness or attention. Unfortunately, as adults we grow to learn that there are threats and traps that exist in this world. Good judgment is required and a neutral mind is required to bring about good judgment. Yoga encourages a neutral mind so that we can make the best decisions with the information presented to us.
The principle of aparigrahā requires us to act in a way that demonstrates that we do not in fact “own” anything. Everything that is here will not go with us when we die. Everything is temporarily here for our use as a gift from the universe. Even our breath is temporary, it flows in and then must be released. We would never think of holding it in, for we would die. It asks us to see that we are provided for and accept what is given with gratitude, trust that more will come, and easily give to others with the knowledge that everything is borrowed. Even our bodies are on “borrowed time” when you think about it. They don’t last forever. One day they will break down and return to the Earth from which they came. Talents are borrowed for as long as the One allows. I’ve read stories of amazingly capable people who have experienced a terrible turn of fate and have wound up incapacitated, paralyzed in a hospital bed. Because everything ultimately is “borrowed” from the One, we have no right to claim it as our own. Imagine borrowing a sweater from a friend. When your friend later asks for it, you declare, “No, you can’t have it! It’s mine!” What do you think the reaction of your friend would be? I’m sure it wouldn’t go over well.
I believe that when we accept with gratitude and give with ease, life is kinder to us. There have been saints who have taken vows of poverty to avoid breaking this observance. I don’t think that is necessary for everyone, but I do think that it is our duty to exhibit gratitude and joy for what we have and when we can’t do that, we should let go and allow someone else to enjoy what we cannot. This act also frees us up to find joy in the people or things that truly do light us up from within. We avoid possessiveness so that we are not bogged down and burdened by our possessions and imprisoned by them. We “own” things, things to do not “own” us. We also avoid clinging to anything in the material/physical world because it is all temporary. When we can see this, it is easier to let change happen as it always inevitably does. People are born, people die. You have riches today, tomorrow you are bankrupt. Health today, sickness tomorrow. Sun today, tomorrow rain. The only thing constant in life is change and the more willing we are to accept this, the easier it is to walk through our life with grace and ease.
Aparigrahā asks us to maintain healthy detachment when it comes to the physical plane. By maintaining this space, we are not rocked when the ground beneath us shakes. We maintain our center even when things shift because we expect them to and are prepared for it. It asks us to let the bags go… I explained this in another one of my works. We are often like bulls in china shops… carrying all we cling to and expecting that nothing will break. The more we carry, of course the wider we are and the more likely that things will shatter around us. When we are free of attachments, we can move easily wherever life asks us to go. Aparigrahā asks us to carry only what is ours to carry… and that is always only what we came here with… our Spirit/our Self.
What are you clinging to that prevents you from being free? If you feel heavy and are having trouble making sense of why, please contact me. We can work through it together in a private coaching or yoga session.