We do not have to put so much pressure on ourselves as parents, nor do we have to hold our parents responsible for their misgivings or perceived failures. Life is our teacher and everything that has happened to us is with purpose, molding our identity, our character, teaching us how to be in this world
Unintentional Lessons Read More »
I wait for you to fall asleep. I sit outside of your door and kill time while your music plays you into a peaceful slumber. You’re beautiful when you sleep… not just when you’re asleep, but always. It’s just that sometimes in the demands of life, I forget. I forget to see the beauty in
Enough… A Letter to My Daughter Read More »
I woke up feeling blessed this morning. I looked over at my seven year old who still creeps into bed with me and I watched her sleep for some time. I felt overwhelmingly lucky to be her mom and happy that she still craved the physical closeness with me that often fades away as we
Same Moment: Different Experience Read More »
Everything becomes a sacred moment where we can’t help but be moved by the world around us. In moments where we can truly feel everything and see everything as the mystery and the miracle that it is, we are catching a glimpse of “Heaven on Earth…” the “Kingdom of God.”
Expedition Happiness Read More »
Rest is critical and while many Type A’s find it hard to do without pouring on guilt, shame, and self-loathing, I implore you to do it and learn how to silence the voices that wish to condemn you for it. There is so much to be gained from stillness.
Rest, Renewal, Connection Read More »
When we don’t know what a stranger’s intentions are and they get close to those we love, we can immediately assume the worst.
It is sometimes hard for introverts to be understood because although we love you deeply, we can only tolerate so much constant interaction with you before we feel ourselves start to fade into the darker places where we don’t wish to go.
Introverted Inner Work Read More »
I see these children and I see my own in their stories. I feel my own heart breaking when I hear the stories of mothers who would give anything to have their child whole, happy, and safe once again.
Your Child is My Child Read More »
When we act on feelings, we wind up with actions that aren’t always in our best interest. We feel vengeful so we key a car, then get caught and end up in court. We feel angry, so we lash out and say a bunch of stuff we don’t mean to intentionally hurt the person that made us angry…
Why Feelings Can’t Always Be Trusted Read More »
“I’m trying my best!” I say to myself for the 10th time today. My child never stops making noise. I’m trying to work, not make her feel ignored, straighten up the house, make lunch, etc. and I am overwhelmed. I’m overstimulated. I’m an introvert and my energy is derived from time alone. My daughter never
Misconceptions of Love Read More »
I just have to stoke the flames of purpose and surround myself with others who can do so when I lose sight of the fire and start allowing it to dim. We all need a team of people around us who care enough to throw some proverbial wood on our fire when they see our flames getting low.
Fan the Flames… Lorax Inspired Read More »
If we look, we can see how our actions impact not only our fellow humans, but all life forms from plants to animals. Often, we are abusing the very same resources that are meant to sustain us. When we refuse to use these resources in a responsible manner, we ultimately destroy them, and we ultimately suffer the consequences. Lack of regard for life around us is actually a form of self-hate and I wish more people lived with an understanding of this.
It was as though the moment I had her, my life’s training wheels came off and it became “go time.” Suddenly the pressure hit and it was about more than just me. There were bigger consequences to losing my balance in life… a whole separate life depended on my ability to balance and ride smoothly. Little eyes peering out from the basket of the handlebars just watching my every move… my facial expressions… my speech… my ability to cope with each challenge life hands me.
Riding the Bicycle of Parenting Read More »
I can see how tyrants turn into tyrants. They were probably trapped in situations where nobody heard them… nobody listened… nobody respected and so they became loud… they demanded to be heard… and they took respect! The pendulum swung powerfully and quickly in the other direction and the meek became the tyrant.
Sweetness in the Middle (this one is raw) Read More »
A poem about the darker side of parenting and the trauma it resurrects for healing.
Trying and trying, but it just isn’t good enough Despite all of the sanding and attempting to smooth Inside I’m still quite rough Rough around the edges despite all of my effort To try and be a good mom Her personality annoys me It might just destroy me Sending me into a spiral of harm
Mom minds are interesting in that we have this script that runs in our head that goes something like, “These other mom’s are making arts and crafts with their kids, baking, singing songs, playing games, etc. and my kid’s over here watching way too much tv and eating snacks while I plug away at my computer in the name of earning a living. I’m a failure!”
Who has less time since the schools have been closed? I know I certainly do. It’s funny to see single people’s posts on social media versus people who have children’s posts. During this time I have to admit I’ve fantasized about what this experience might be like if I didn’t have my 7 year old
As I engage in self-study, I see when my ego is about to roar and am better able to take a pause before I say or do something that won’t lead to the highest good… mine or anybody else’s. Today, while on a conference call, I felt my annoyance growing with a colleague of mine
Tonight, I went to a birthday party for a girl at my daughter’s school. I have to admit I was feeling a little stressed out with the thought of going. I’d ordered her gift on Amazon and it didn’t come in on time. Delivery stated that it would be in at any point through 9pm
New Friends, Prayers Answered Read More »
It’s frustrating when someone says they will do something and then they don’t. This one thing cuts through me like a knife. If you want to irritate me, tell me you are going to do something and then fail to do it. I think I’m a pretty easy person to live with. I don’t ask
It’s interesting how judgment can lead to such insidious behavior in people. Recently, I’d had an experience where I was severely misjudged. An extremely off base attack was made on my parenting, which could have resulted in a violent situation if I were a different person than I am today. I am so grateful for
Last night, while my mother took our daughter overnight, my fiancé of over 5 years and I went to have dinner at the first spot I’ve seriously considered as a wedding venue. I’m sharing this because it’s been a long time coming and I feel God has been working with me and leading me to
I’ve been noticing societal programming that basically says, “It’s selfish for you to do anything without your family if you have a family.” It’s as though when you have children, many people expect that you bring them on every vacation. If you are doing something fun for yourself that could potentially be fun for your
I’m a firm believer that when you ask, you usually receive although what you receive isn’t always what you’d expected. As I’ve been seeking more opportunities to be of service lately, my eyes have been opened to the # of people in my immediate circle who are hurting and in need support and love. Some
Suffering Close to Home Read More »
If you’re familiar with my work, you’ll know I firmly believe that when we ask, God always answers. The most recent example of this in my own life is pretty interesting. I took my mom out for her 60th birthday to a murder mystery dinner with my fiancé and her partner. At the show, you
Life… who dictates whether it is to be? I am torn this evening as I consider the recent bills passed in Alabama and Missouri. I’ve seen many of the posts about this topic on social media and find myself feeling a little divided because of my spirituality. I know that the church wholeheartedly agrees with
Relationships can be challenging. I’ve been working through my feelings around a certain person within my life these days. This is a person that I’ve been really close to in seasons of my life. When you’re close to someone it’s hard to watch them go through things that are beneath them. Sometimes it’s hard to
I attend church every Sunday and this year, my grandfather has been accompanying me. Usually I pick him up, but the past couple of weeks, he’s insisted on meeting me there with his own car. I find this slightly odd, but haven’t asked about it. As we were waiting to go into church this weekend,
Sacred Moments Slip Away Read More »
Be shepherds over the flock God has entrusted to you. Watch over it as God does: Don’t do this because you have to, but because you want to. Don’t do it out of greed, but out of a desire to serve. Don’t be rulers over the people entrusted to you, but be examples for the flock
Eye for an Eye Makes the Whole World Blind Read More »