The fear is palpable as I peruse the internet. Everywhere I turn there is information about Covid-19. The news keeps coming as more and more large organizations shut down and request bailouts. It’s enough to make even those of us who are usually pretty centered a bit shaky. I keep bringing myself back to my faith and remembering that God is in control of it all. Life as we know it has been interrupted, possibly even halted. We are in a very important period of change and I keep refocusing my unruly mind back to the fact that change is. Change is. Change is.
Looking at the design of this world, we encounter change every day, though most of it doesn’t feel as though it directly affects us in a major way. Animals die, leaves die, plants die, cells die, people die, and at the same time births continue. Nature is cyclical and balanced. In some way, I see the current state of things as the very necessary re-balancing of nature. With all the damage we’ve done to this Earth: mining for jewels, oil, and other natural resources; endless killing of other life forms; constant air pollution; contamination of the oceans… I’m not surprised that nature is striking back in the form of this virus and am tempted to even say we deserve it.
As I see the actions being called for in this time, I feel that in some ways we are attempting to battle nature for striking back at us. We are attempting to hide from the consequences of our actions. Though there is no hiding from what is ordained. I look out my window and watch the stray cats and birds flying about in my yard and see that none of them are concerned. Other facets of nature seem to accept the days as they come with whatever they bring without rebelling too hard over it. They realize that to be at peace, there isn’t really any other choice but to embrace life with acceptance.
As I watch people panic, and witness myself in this time, I see how spoiled and entitled we are in this country. I think about others who go without the luxury of grocery stores, movie theaters, clothing stores, educational institutions and other places of entertainment. Yet, when we are asked to refrain from these things, many of us panic. Change makes us scared, though we need to stop and consider why that is. Ultimately, I think it comes down to the fear of death. When things change we fear annihilation in some way. When we realize there is no such thing as security, when we accept change, we are free to be at peace.
There is something calming in surrender… in acknowledging that I am not in control of the future. I am not in control of tomorrow or even the next moment and never have been. This somehow frees me of any fear or worry I might be experiencing. Allowing each moment to be what it is frees me of any dilemma over what the best course of action is. I understand that any action I take in an attempt to feel more secure or safe is in vain. If God wills my last breath to come as a result of illness or famine, there is no stopping it. Knowing this, I choose to trust that every day is exactly as it is supposed to be… unfolding just as it should.
The world has stopped, markets are crashing, all nonessential places of business have closed their facilities and we are still here! We are still existing, still experiencing, still living, still choosing our thoughts in each moment. Life goes on, though maybe not in the same way we’d come to know it, but it continues. We just need to accept and take it all in making the best of each moment we have. Panic will not “save” us. Fear will not “save” us. Love may not even “save” us.