Fairly randomly, last night my daughter asked me to write a book entitled “The Book of Love” since she knows I’ve often dreamed of writing a childrens’ book that is just as amazing as my favorite childrens’ book of all time, “The Giving Tree” by Shel Silverstein. I’ll admit, I haven’t been as inspired around this dream lately since I’ve been focusing my energy on this project and blogging primarily for an adult readership. However, I’m thinking that the universe may be putting a bug in my ear to direct some of my energy a bit differently and revive this dream that has been lying dormant within me. Oddly enough, I find that most children’s’ movies and books have more to offer in terms of spiritual lessons than most adult centered content. I find them more enjoyable for this reason.
I also enjoy content that causes me to gain another perspective with each read. “The Giving Tree“ is just that kind of book. Each time I read it, I am left with another layer and another viewpoint. It speaks to me similarly to my favorite movie of all time, “What Dreams May Come.” While I aspire to write a work that is just as good as these beautiful pieces of art, a small part of me is afraid to attempt it because I doubt that I can create such a work. That right there is the focus of this blog.
Why is it that we doubt ourselves and choose not to believe that we are or can be every bit as good or better than those that we admire? Why do we put others who are doing what we’d like to do on a pedestal? I think this is what the Bible speaks of time and time again when it states, “You shall have no other God besides me” or curses the idea of idolatry. Idolatry is the idolization of that which is other than God. It is the worship of idols or extreme admiration, love, or reverence for something or someone; immoderate attachment or devotion to something; the worship of a physical object as a God (Merriam Webster).
It dawns on me that every time I am building others up as being “more” than I am in some way, thereby infusing doubt in my own God-given capabilities or skills, I am committing idolatry. I am not honoring God’s spirit within me when I doubt myself or my capabilities. I am not honoring the God who created me with His power when I doubt the power he granted me in this life. No matter how small this voice may be, whether it be simply a whisper or a blaring siren, it’s just as big of a problem because it prevents you from having full and total faith, belief, and confidence in yourself and robs you of some of the power that could be utilized toward creating that which you desire and lessening your impact.
The mind is a valuable tool and we get to choose how we are going to use it. Based on my internet behavior, this concept seems to be trending in all recommendations that are coming to me lately. In addition, my church is currently in the midst of a series entitled, “My mind’s playing tricks on me.” We need to stop lying to ourselves about what we can and cannot do, what we are capable of and what we are not. More of us need to step out on blind faith with complete trust in our capabilities knowing that we have the power of God living within us and therefore can succeed.
If you aren’t buying into the biblical idolatry references or “God living within us” bit of this blog, take a moment and watch a YouTube video that I watched yesterday evening, “Change your mindset, Change the game“ Dr. Alia Crum takes a scientific approach to this same topic and is basically saying the same thing. Your mindset is powerful. It drives what you will accomplish or will not. Henry Ford knew this.
Our beliefs about ourselves, about others, about what is possible, what is not possible, what our purpose is, who we are, why we are here are critical to our ability to lead the life that we desire. The most wonderful or disastrous part of this is that we are the ones who get to choose what we believe. We get to choose what we adopt as truth.
This is why I’ve chosen to do this work. There are too many of us roaming around with faulty beliefs about ourselves, our potential, the potential for change in the world, our potential to be joyful, our worthiness, our goodness, our capability for amazing success. I want to change that. I want to change this not only for myself, but for you, for our children, for their children, and so forth. I want you to know that you get to choose! Are you going to choose thoughts that lift you up and challenge you to move forward or are you choosing thoughts that are going to beat you down and make you stay stuck? Are you going to hear the thought within you that says, “My work could never be as good as so and so’s” and stop in your tracks or are you going to sharpen your mental sword and challenge that thought with something like, “Their work is amazing and inspires me. There’s absolutely no reason why I couldn’t create something just as awesome or better than so and so. I’m going to take a stab at it! I can do it.”
The first step in this process is being able to identify and catch your thoughts as they come. Meditation, yoga, prayer, and therapy have all taught me to do this. There isn’t a lot that gets by me unchecked these days. I’ve developed a filter within my brain that allows me to screen my thoughts rather carefully so that I can sift the truth from the lies. When I hear a lie, I put it in it’s place by thinking a counter thought as shown in the example I provided above. Yoga has taught me to tune into my body and how it feels when reframing thoughts. There are physical changes that I am able to notice within my body that correlate to my thinking. When I reframe the lies and put them to bed, I can feel a shift in my being from heaviness to lightness, defeated to empowered.
The most important thing that I want to teach through my work is that we are all free to choose our own thoughts. We all have the ability to see our thoughts and change them. We all get to choose who we are going to be within no matter our situation without. Like Victor Frankl wrote about in Man’s Search for Meaning,
Here was a man going through the holocaust who had the sense to recognize that they could not take the ability to choose his thoughts from him. You may be in hell externally, but your mind can be heaven if you would only choose it.
It takes practice, but it is a skill that can be learned. Your current thoughts are not just “who you are.” If your thoughts aren’t healthy, you aren’t just destined to be miserable, mediocre, or stuck. Everyone has the capability of learning this skill. It just takes a commitment and effort to dig into what you are thinking and in some cases why you are thinking it so that you can have an easier time forgiving yourself for thinking that way in the first place. Trust me, if you are anything like I was, you will start noticing some really hurtful thoughts going on toward yourself and they can make you feel really sad for how you’ve treated yourself. Forgiveness is key to move out of the place of self-hatred for how you have treated you.
I honor your journey and I pray that you discover peace within and without no matter your situation.
How have you been speaking to yourself? How is your belief in you on a scale of 1-10 (1 being “I have no faith in me” / 10 being “I can change the world!”)? What prevents you from being a 10?
I’d love to help you move up the scale. Please contact me if you want to work for progress in your life.